If you want to meet your dream guy (and I’m sure you do if you’re here), I want to invite you to consider changing your perspective and the way you see dating.
Can we do things differently in dating? Can we stop approaching dating only to chase numbers and meet more and more people? Can we not only put ourselves out there but make every action and every interaction with guys more meaningful? Can we stop focusing on meeting more people and start focusing on meeting the right people?
Today I want to discuss how meeting fewer people can lead you to your soulmate. This might be completely different from what you heard before.
Experts are saying: dating is a numbers game, meet more and more people, the more people you meet the greater chance that you’ll meet your soulmate. There is nothing wrong with action, but unfortunately, action alone is not always enough to lead you to the relationship you want.
Before you put yourself out there, do this
I was dating for many years. I was putting myself out there. I was following the advice to meet more and more people. It’s logical: the more people we meet, the sooner we’ll meet our soulmates. But love doesn’t work like math. Our life is not an equation.
You can see many women out there who always have long term relationships and get married easily. On the other hand, some women are meeting hundreds of guys and they never get to their happily ever after.
When I was following the advice to treat dating as a numbers game and focus on meeting more and more people, I didn’t meet my dream guy. This strategy only led me to meet more guys who were wrong. It also lowered my confidence, got me frustrated with dating, led me to believe that I’ll end up alone.
I wanted someone to commit to me and have a meaningful relationship. But I was meeting completely the opposite. I was meeting guys who don’t want to commit, who are players, who want only “one thing”. And if you now feel like this, I completely get your pain, fear and frustration. But I also know that there is a different way.
At some point, I did something no expert will tell you – I stopped dating completely. I put all the attention on myself. I prioritized myself and focused on the inner work. After 6 months when I went back to online dating, to the same app, within a week I matched with my husband.
So what is the difference between dating for years and meeting only the wrong guys and dating for a week and attracting my dream guy?
What made the difference for me, and what is making difference for my clients, is doing the foundational work before you take action and put yourself out there. That is when action makes sense and gets you the relationship you want.
“When you do the foundational work of mindset, confidence, self-love and knowing your desires before you put yourself out there is when you meet your dream guy.”
Building a strong foundation of mindset, confidence and self-love
Your thoughts create your reality.
If you believe that all guys are the same or that guys will always betray you or that online dating doesn’t work, guess what, that is exactly what is going to happen.
Only when you shift your mindset, reprogram limiting believes and start believing that your soulmate is looking for you, he will come. When you start believing you’re worthy and deserving of your love story that is when he’ll show up.
One of my favourite quotes says “If you believe you can or you believe you can’t, you are right”, You are always right.
If you believe that your soulmate is coming, you’re right.
If you believe that you’ll end up alone, you’re right.
Every action reflects what you believe in. If you believe all guys are the same, you’ll meet many people, and guess what, all of them will be the same.
The first step, before putting yourself other, is building a foundation of confidence, a strong mindset, loving yourself, knowing what you want and claiming your desires.
“The first step, before putting yourself other, is building a foundation of confidence, a strong mindset, loving yourself, knowing what you want and claiming your desires.”
Dating the right way
When you do foundational work and you’re ready to take action, the quality of that action will decide if you’ll end up in a soulmate relationship or you’ll keep spinning in the cycle of meeting more and more people.
The action that will lead you to your soulmate is inspired action.
After you build your foundation, change your mindset, build confidence, love yourself and connect with your desires, start following how you feel in your body when you get ideas and inspiration.
Start noticing your thoughts, start noticing your guidance and inspiration to do certain things.
Even though I was frustrated with online dating and I didn’t want to go back on the app, I was following my inspiration. After a while of doing the inner work, I got the inspiration to go back to online dating. At first, I ignored the calling. It sounded horrible to go back there. I wanted to meet my soulmate in a different way, but this inspiration was coming to me very often. For example, at the time one of my friends met an amazing guy online and she was convincing me every day to go back.
I was getting ideas, I was getting inspiration, I was getting the same messages over and over again. As soon as I acted on this inspiration, everything changed for me.
I registered for online dating and went to the same app that was driving me crazy before. But this time it felt completely different.
Guy’s didn’t change, their behaviour didn’t change, but my reaction to them changed.
I acted differently than before, I reacted differently than before, I behaved differently than before. This time I knew what I wanted, I believed I was worthy of it and I wasn’t willing to compromise my desires.
“Inspired action is a hundred times more powerful than any action that comes from fear or lonelines.”
Inner work + Dating = Magic
If you’ve been in the same boat like me and many other women who were putting themselves out there without success, I invite you to consider a formula: inner work + dating = meeting your dream guy.
Focus on creating a strong mindset, building confidence, loving yourself and defining what kind relationship you want before you put yourself out there. That’s when dating will result in meeting your dream man.